The Puppeteer or The Puppet?
by Whovian2525
Summary: Is Robbie the puppeteer or the puppet? Robbie carries around Rex, which gets him in trouble. Robbie gets bullied and abused every single day in his life, is it too much to handle? Or can he cut his own strings off and stop being everyone's puppet? Jade and Robbie friendship. Major Cabbie to come!
1. The Dreaded First Day

**Hello! How are you guys? This is my first Victorious fanfiction, so please be kind! If you want to check out my other stories, I would really appreciate it! I am writing stories for House of Anubis, iCarly, Modern Family, Dance Moms, and That 70s Show. If you like any of those shows, please read the stories! Up to you, whatever you want. I hope you like this story!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious. If I did, I would let it have one more season. And I would have Cabbie be the main relationship.**

**Robbie's POV:**

I walked in the intimidating hallway of Hollywood Arts, instantly scared for my life. Kids everywhere were dancing, painting on lockers, singing, and even shooting a film. I still can't believe I got in. And just for doing comedy with Rex. And also singing, but I'm not that good at it. Rex is my best friend. A lot of people call him my puppet, but I don't like that word. Neither does Rex.

I remember the day that my dad gave me Rex. It was the day before my birthday. Well, more like the night before my birthday. I was turning seven years old, I was so excited. My mother promised me a dog but I never got one. She said that money was tight. That was before… well, nevermind. Anyways, Dad gave me Rex and told me to always keep him tight. As long as Rex was with me, my dad was with me. I haven't seen him since. He never called, he never sent cards on Christmas or my birthday, nothing. My mother… she killed herself two days later. I was sent to my uncle's and been living there ever since.

My uncle calls me weird for having a 'puppet' but I try not to listen to him. He once took Rex and threw him in the garbage. Luckily, I found him before the trash guys came. When I told my uncle that I got into Hollywood Arts, he laughed and gave me the money. He said that he wanted to see me fail. He laughed for the rest of dinner.

I snap back into reality when I knock into a girl with curly light brown hair. She looked up at me and mumbled a sorry while walking away. I retrieved my schedule from the ground and looked at one last time, even though I memorised it yesterday. My first class is Sikowitz theatre class. That's such a strange name, I thought to myself.

I walk towards the class and slump in the first seat. I open the bag and pull out Rex.

"This place is safe. We can be who we are, no judgements, okay?" I whisper to Rex in his ear. He nods and I smile. I feel a piece of paper hit me on the back of the head. When I turn around, I see the same girl from before. I open the note and it says, 'you're weird. what's your name?' I scribble my name on it and throw it back to the mysterious girl.

-an even weirder name. i'm jade

-nice name. see? i can give compliments

-haha *note sarcasm* so why are you here?

-what do you mean?

-come on, you have to be insanely talented to get in here. what's your talent?

-rex and i do comedy

-rex?

-ugh, the 'puppet'

-why the air quotes?

-because he's not a puppet to me

-then who is he?

-my best friend. no, that's not right. he's everything to me

-hm, interesting. you have guts to come here as that talent

-why is that?

-you're not normal

-what's wrong with that?

-nothing

-good, then. so why are you in here?

-oh i murdered someone

-seriously

Before she could respond, a guy took Rex and laughed, trying to take off his clothes. Jade just sat back in her seat, texting. I'm not sure why, but I felt betrayed. I thought that she would do something to help me. But apparently not. I sat back in my seat, waiting for the torture to end. I thought… I thought this year it would be different, I would be able to be someone who I wouldn't feel ashamed being. Last year, it got so bad… I don't want something like that happening this year. But I think that was happening yet again.

Finally, the bell rang and the obnoxious guy had to give me back Rex. I mumbled a thanks and fixed Rex's hair.

"What did you say?" the guy asked, standing up from the seat, grabbing me by the collar, lifting me up from the ground. I rolled my eyes and frowned. l knew what was coming next, a beating and laughter from his friends. It's happened a billion times before.

"Listen, I know what you're going to do. You're going to act superior and intimidating while I let out a girly shriek as you punch me in the face. You're going to threaten me and then tell me to kill myself, which I will attempt in four months time, so just get it over with," by now, everyone listened in and I couldn't care less. They could update this on the internet, do what the hell you want. I mean it when I say I'm going to kill myself, it didn't work last time, and by the way things are going right now, I just don't care anymore. Maybe I'll do it earlier, whatever happens happens. I'm just sick of how everyone treats me. How everyone looks at me.

The guy looked perplexed, unsure of how to handle the situation, which is strange and points out how stupid he really is because I already explained how it's going to go down. I sighed and looked at my watch.

"Listen, my legs are getting tired, just get it over with," I shrugged and sighed, he was still looking at me blankly. "Really? God, fine, I'll make it easier. Use your fist right there, yes that one, and punch me in the face, making me fall to the ground, so you can just put me out of my misery right now. I'm literally asking you to beat me up, if that's not a get out of jail free card, I don't what is," he blinked back fast, and looked at his fist. The room is still silent, and everyone is excited to see how it's going to go down, which is strange because I thought it was obvious. I get punched, people laugh and take pictures, then I get kicked in the side, I grunt, a teacher comes in, I pretend it's a stomach ache, the guy picks me up and whispers in my ear that I should kill myself, and in four months, I will take some pills and lay unconscious in my bed, and hopefully no one won't find me this time.

"Hm, is this a new student?" a teacher comes in, but the thing is, no one lets go of me. They must encourage bullying. Whatever, I'm going to get beaten up eventually, why not in the grasp of a teacher who won't let it get out of hand too much.

"This is the first day of school," I respond, in a monotone voice. Well, I'm always in a monotone voice. It's just the way it is sometimes.

"Is it? Hm, that's why no kids were here yesterday," I slightly turn my head around and see a man with bald hair and a coconut in his left hand, jump down from the stage. He is wearing no shoes and is wearing bohemian styled clothing. Is he really our acting teacher?

"Well, what is the situation here?" he asks, coming over to me, looking me straight in the eye. I shrug and sigh.

"Well, I've been waiting for this guy to punch me. It's strange, I told him the step by step process but he won't do it, I mean, come on, my legs are getting tired," I sigh, knowing that probably no one even cares. Not that I care, it's just, well, my legs are tired being up in the air.

"I see, and um, why is he going to punch you and why are you not surprised about this?" Sikowitz asks me. I raise my eyebrows at him, in surprise. "And why are you surprised by my questions? Is that not what you were looking for?" I contemplated over this. No, I'm not not surprised but no one has ever asked me those things.

"To answer why he's going to punch me is because he took Rex, my friend laying on the ground over there, and when he gave it back I said thank you but he took that as an insult, which I do not understand, I was thanking him, not calling him out by how he has no brain, and if he does, I think it's still on summer vacation. I am not surprised by this because in middle school, all I ever got was a beating because of Rex. I don't care anymore, really. I am surprised by your questions because you're the first one to actually seem interested. The teachers would simply believe my lies about having a stomach ache or me walking into a pole when they would see my black eye. No, what I was looking for was, well, not that," I simply answered. "I'm not trying to make you feel sympathy, I just wanted to answer your question," I reassured. Sikowitz leaned back in his chair and sipped his coconut water.

"Alex, put the boy down, and everyone, do what you want, I'm going to have a chat with, um, whoever you are, and bring your friend Rex," Alex put me down and everyone got on their phones, probably texting everyone about this previous situation, while I picked up Rex, following the teacher out into the hallway.

"Present," I sarcastically raised my hand in the air as well as Rex's.

"Funny. You called Rex your friend, but he's a puppet, why is that?" I roll my eyes at him. I'm sick of this shit.

"What? You have a problem with that?" I scoff, annoyed. Isn't he supposed to be a teacher?

"No, not at all. I think it's the reason why you got into this school. Because it's unique,"

"If it's so unique, then why do I still get bullied? I thought this school encouraged being different. It's the reason why I wanted to be in this school,"

"Well, because Alex is a jackass, that's why. And they're not used to you. You said that you always got bullied, how did you handle that?" he stares into my eyes. Something about him seems off.

"I attempted suicide," I said, in the open, not that he would send me to the counselor, teachers don't care, they just want to get the day over with and go home. They hate school just as much as we students do. And they are the ones who have to put up with all of our crap.

"Why didn't it work?" I'm stumbled by this response.

"I took some pills but I survived," I remember that day perfectly. The disappointment in my uncle's eyes when he found out that I was alive, the punch I got after I got home from the hospital.

"You were that boy, I was wondering how he was. You were on the news, you know. So, how are you holding up?" I close my eyes, hating how I had to be on the news. Why does everything have to be a story? I just wanted to die in peace, but both of those things wasn't successful.

"Um, honestly, I still hate my life, I want to die every morning, and-"

"Then why don't you kill yourself again?" he cuts me off. What the hell? He wants me to kill myself? "I'm not encouraging you, I just want to know why you won't kill yourself if you wish to die every morning?"

"Um, I just… I don't know,"

"Something is keeping you from killing yourself. When you find that out, come to me. I'm curious to know what it is," he walks away from me, the bell ringing, letting us know to get to our next class. I sighed and walked off, still thinking of the conversation.

Later, at lunch, I saw Jade talking with some girl with red violet hair. She was really cute. But I was still mad at Jade. Why am I obsessed with this? She didn't even want to be my friend, she's just some girl who wanted a conversation at the time.

I sat down at an empty table, taking out a book and opening it. I felt a tap on the shoulder. When I looked up, I saw Jade and the cute girl with this other guy. I closed the book and grabbed Rex.

"Sorry, you can have this seat," I said, ready to leave, but the guy sat me back down.

"Nah, it's cool. So, it's Robbie, huh?" he asked. I nodded slowly.

"Ya, how'd you know?" did Jade tell him?

"Jade told me," I nodded and put Rex down.

"Cool pupp-"

"His name is Rex, right?" Jade cut off the cute girl. I smiled, remembering how I wrote her that I hated that people called him a, well, you know.

"Ya," I put my book away in my backpack, checking to see if I have money for lunch. I didn't have breakfast, which wasn't that surprising, my uncle never had food around. And if he did have something, it would be beer, and I didn't like that stuff.

"I'm Cat! You know, like the animal? And that's Andre," the cute girl giggled while sitting next to me. She grabbed Rex and played with his hair. "Does Rex like giraffes?" she asked me. I raised my eyebrows, but I smiled. Did she really think of Rex as a human, as I do?

"He wouldn't know, he's never been to the zoo and neither have I," Cat gasped and looked at Andre.

"You've never been to the zoo? How do you live?" she asked, laughing. I think of my life and that's the reason why I have never been to the zoo.

"So, Robbie, have you ever seen the Scissoring? It's the best movie in the world," Jade asked me.

"I've heard of it, but I've never seen it. I hear it's like one of the scariest movies ever made,"

"It's illegal in Canada," Cat shrieked by Jade's words and hugged my waist, clutching on tightly. I smiled at this, I've never had a pretty girl hug me before.

"Shit," I laughed. Cat let go of me when she saw that the line for food was empty. She took my hand and grabbed me towards the food truck, everyone else following. I couldn't get anything, I didn't have any money.

"Robbie, are you going to get something?" Andre asked me. I shook my head.

"Nah, not hungry," I said, right when my evil stomach just had to rumble. Andre raised an eyebrow but said nothing. I sat back down at the table and hoisted Rex up against my backpack.

We sat at lunch all together, just talking and laughing about nonsense. I felt happy for once.


	2. A Day in the Life of Robbie

**Hello, how are you? Okay, so was chapter one okay? I just re-read it and I sort of cringed, but I guess all authors do that. Except John Green, he should feel proud of everything he writes, even his grocery list. Well, if there are people out there who are actually interested in this story, I hope you enjoy chapter two. Thank you!**

**Disclaimer: WHY WAS CABBIE NOT APART OF IT? IT IS A DISGRACE! D=**

**Robbie's POV:**

I came home from my first day, actually smiling. I opened the sliding door but my smile disappeared. The kitchen was a mess, and I just cleaned it up this morning. Damn Steve. I set Rex on the counter and grabbed a broom. If I didn't clean up before he came home, he would give me a black eye and a scar on my back. I never told anyone, but that's because one, no one ever cared, and two, they never suspected because I always had black eyes anyway.

When I was finished with the kitchen, I went to the living room to clean. I checked the time, it was already three-thirty. I sighed as I knew he was coming home at four, waiting for dinner to be cooked, so I set the feather duster down and went into the pantry. The only thing there was soup but he would just pour it on the ground if I ever served him that. I went into my room and found my fake id, I had to buy him beer or else. I grabbed my skateboard and road towards the grocery store, which was connected to a liquor store.

When I arrived, I got beer and chicken, the meal he always loved. I took out twenty bucks from my wallet, okay, I was lying, I did have money for lunch, but this money is for Steve, not me. And no, he doesn't give me the money, I have a job that I go to on the weekends.

I saw Cat and Jade by the ice cream department and I looked at the beer in my hands and cringed. What if they saw me? I wouldn't be able to explain myself. Then, I felt a slap on my shoulder. I turned around and saw Andre. I freezed in place.

"Hey, look it's Robbie. Hey, what's with the beers?" he asked me. I regained my voice and laughed.

"Um, my uncle pays me for buying them for him. He can't," by this time, Jade and Cat arrived.

"Oh, how do you buy them?" I stumble around for my fake id but I can't find it. I look at my watch and curse under my breath, he's almost home. And he's expecting beer. Shit.

"I have to go, here," I hand Andre the beers and walk off. I feel a tap on my shoulder and I see Jade. I take her hand off my shoulder and go to the check out counter. I get the chicken and then I don't see the skateboard.

"SHIT!" I scream, getting scolds from a mother.

"Robbie, are you okay?" Jade asks me. Um, no! If I don't get home in five minutes, I'll be killed. Maybe Jade has a car.

"Do you have a car?" she nods and takes out her keys. Thank god she had to repeat her eighth grade year. We get into the car and she drives, while I give her the address. When she pulls up, I see Steve get out of the car. I curse out loud and wave by to Jade. Steve walks towards me and grabs me by the collar, pulling me inside the house, but not before he just has to yell at me. I can smell the beer from his breath.

"YOU USELESS, GOD, WHERE THE FUCK IS MY BEER? DID YOU HEAR THAT? WHERE IS IT?" I see Jade backing up, looking at me, but I shoo her away.

Steve throws me in the house and sees that the living room is a mess still. He goes into his room and curses. He comes out with a belt. I take off my shirt, knowing what comes next. I scream in agony as the leather belt creates scars on my back. I clutch the ground, trying to gasp for air. My ears hear the screams and yells from Steve, how I'm a pussy and a worthless piece of shit. How many times do I have to hear this before I actually believe this? Oh wait, I already do. Steve stops and grabs the chicken from next to me. He picks me up from the collar and punches me in the face, and kicks me in the stomach. I hunch over, feeling like I'm already dead.

Then I remember Rex is still on the counter. I turn over as best as I can as I see. Steve holds Rex and rips his arm off throwing it at me, along with Rex.

"GET OUT OF THE LIVING ROOM, I'M WATCHING TV," Steve yells. I tremble as I put force on my left arm, trying to get up. I fall, knowing that if I don't get up now, he's going to hurt me even more. I use my greatest strength to get up, limping to my room, holding Rex, his arm, and my shirt.

I fall on my bed, having enough strength to go over to my bedside table, taking out a knife and a blood-stained washcloth. I try to cut but I don't have enough strength. I sigh, giving up. I place the knife on the table and just lay in my bed, feeling worthless.

The next morning, I wake up, my back stinging. I look at my watch and see that I still have two hours before school starts. I go into the bathroom and wash my hair, grabbing the hand soap. Nope, I don't even have any money for shampoo. I finish up and grab my glasses, taking my sewing kit and grabbing Rex. I finish with his arm and grab the knife. I cut on my shoulder, the place where no one will know. I feel relief as the blood drops, knowing that this pain is the kind that I have control over. That's why I do it, I just want control over something.

I place a new shirt on and head to the kitchen, grabbing an expired granola bar, seeing Steve on the couch, wasted. I have no idea how he got beer but at least he's sleeping now. He won't do anything. I go back into my room and grab my backpack, along with Rex, and slip out of the house by the window covered up by a Parachute band poster.

When I get to school, I head towards my locker, placing Rex inside. I mumble sorry, but whatever. I see Cat gasp and head over to me, along with Jade and Andre. Cat hugs me and I smile.

"Hey Kitty Cat," I thought of a new name for her. She giggles and places her hand on my eye, it hurting like hell. I cringe and she takes her hand off and hugs me tightly, my back stinging, me feeling weak. I fall to the ground, feeling the room around me turn upside down. I hear my name called out but I can't respond, I don't even know where they're coming from.

I wake up in presumably the nurse's room. I get up and thankfully, my shirt is still on. I get up and I see Cat, Jade, and Andre come over to me, looking worried. I wave to them and smile.

"You guys didn't have to take me to the nurse's office. It happens a lot, don't worry," they all look at each other and sit on the bed.

"Robbie, you have low blood sugar. Like really low. When was the last time you ate?" I can't believe they think I have an eating disorder. I just can't eat, if I do, I'll get a serious beating, even worse than last night.

"So I didn't eat last night, whatever. There was nothing in the house," I explain.

"But you bought a chicken, you didn't eat that?" Cat asks, her eyes getting glossy.

"Why do you guys care?" I ask, curious.

"Because you're our friend," I shake my head.

"No one has ever cared before," I sit on the bed, Cat grabbing me by the shoulder. I cringe but I don't want them to get suspicious so I let it be. Jade grabs me and leads me outside.

"What was that with your uncle last night? I didn't tell anyone, but what's going on?" she asks me.

"It's nothing," I try to go back into the nurse's office but Jade grabs me by the shoulder. I cringe and almost fall on the ground in pain. She raises an eyebrow and before I can stop her, she unbuttons my shirt, looking at the shoulders and back.

"Robbie, did he do this to you? Along with the black eye?" she asks me. I stare at my shoes and sigh.

"I did the shoulder but he did everything else. Please don't tell anyone," I plead. She starts shaking her head.

"I can't let him do this to you, you don't deserve this," I roll my eyes.

"I should have gotten him the beers last night. But please, don't tell anyone,"

"He did this to you because you didn't get him beer?" she scoffs.

"Ya, what's so funny about that?" I ask.

"Robbie, you have to tell someone," I shake my head rapidly while fixing my shirt.

"They'll put me in a foster home, I won't be able to come back to Hollywood Arts, my life will be ruined, this is for the best, please," I plead.

"But Robbie-"

"Please, if you're my friend, you'll let me stay," I plead once more. She gives up and nods, annoyed. I thank her and I head back into the nurse's office.

"So, no, I do not have an eating disorder, it's just that the chicken was expired so I couldn't eat it and I had a granola bar this morning, so I'm fine. We'll have food tonight," I say, thank god I found an excuse. They sighed and nodded but Jade rolled her eyes. Hopefully she won't tell anyone or else I don't think I could ever trust her again. Tonight, I'll be sure I get him his beer and food. But the only thing is, I'm going to have to keep Rex in my locker from now on, every minute of every day.


	3. A Day at the Beach

**Hello my lovelies! How are you liking this story so far? And yes, Jade has brown curly hair and wears non-goth clothes but she'll be like herself soon enough. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter! And remember to review! Thank you!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious. CABBIE ALL THE WAY!**

**Robbie's POV:**

A week has passed since Jade found out. But I still get beaten up and every day, I come to school with more scars on my back and shoulders, and with a fresh black eye. Everyone is used to it, but occasionally, they do ask. I just have to tell them that a guy was making fun of Rex, or I walked into a pole, or I fell on a rock. But thankfully, Steve is going on a vacation for a few weeks, so I'll be able to use my money for myself, and I won't get any new scars. He leaves tomorrow, I'm so happy.

In Sikowitz class, we have to do this Bird Scene thing. I finished yesterday so now I'll be able to be in plays and stuff, not that I have time. I'm gonna be enjoying myself without the disgraceful Steve hovering over me with that tortured belt.

At lunch, I actually decided to buy a burrito but this girl had to buy the last one, so I decided to buy a thing called an enchilada? I'm not really sure what it is, but it looks delicious. Right as I was about to eat it, Alex had to take it from me and throw it in the trash. I slumped in my seat, knowing that I couldn't buy another one, I have to use the rest of the money I had for Steve's dinner. That lazy ass son of a bitch, I hate him so much. But… he was the only one who took me in, not even my grandparents would take me in. I haven't gotten any cards from them either. I wonder what I did for everyone to hate me so much, I mean, I was just being me. Maybe it's Rex. No, no, I will not blame Rex, this is all me. It's my fault.

I had to listen to everyone's conversations about them going to the beach, which I have never gone to.

"So, you want to join us? It'll be so much fun!" Cat asked me. I slowly shook my head. They would see my scars, they would ask questions, I didn't want that happening.

"Nah, I'm okay," I turn down the offer.

"No! Come on, Jade's dad is taking us, then we're going to her house after. Come on, you can bring Rex!" Cat begged. I sighed but gave in, knowing that I had never gone to the beach before, so why not?

"Fine, when is it?" I asked. Jade said friday, which was tomorrow and I nodded. Steve is leaving in the morning before I wake up, hopefully, if he ever gets to the airport.

*The Next Day*

I smiled and threw my fists in the air seeing Steve leave. I had to sit down, my new black eye was hurting so much. I couldn't get ice packs last night, Steve was in the kitchen the whole night, drinking beer and playing poker with his friends. I packed my bathing suit in my backpack and a t-shirt because even though I'm going to the beach, doesn't mean I have to take off my shirt, right? I slipped into the kitchen and grabbed a granola bar when I remembered that I could have anything I wanted. I made myself some leftover chicken and left. Rex would be happy that he could finally come home.

After school, we waited for Jade's dad to pick us up for the beach. I just changed into my swimming trunks, thankful that I even had them. I only have a few selective clothes that actually fit me, and I only had one pair of swimming trunks. I am so glad that they actually fit.

We headed into Jade's dad's car, while I met her dad. I introduced Rex and her dad sort of freaked out.

"Hi, I'm Robbie Shapiro, and this is Rex, my erm, puppet. But I don't like people calling him that," I introduced myself. Cat giggled and took Rex from me, hugging him. I blushed, she's so cute. I wish she would do that to me. Mr. West looked startled and then smiled big.

"It's nice to meet you, Robbie. So, tell me about yourself," I frowned, thinking of myself. What can I tell him that I can say in front of everybody else? Well, I can tell him that I live with my uncle, but then I'll have to tell him about how my mom killed herself. And that my dad left. It's okay though. It is, really. I just have to make myself believe that and it'll be fine. I looked at Cat, having a fight with Andre. Jade was on her phone, texting some guy.

"Well, I am fifteen, and I also go to Hollywood Arts. I got in for doing a comedy skit with Rex and I also played a song I wrote-"

"You can sing?" Cat asked, excited. My cheeks blushed and nodded, embarrassed. Why did I tell him that?

"I'm not that good, though. I'm surprised they took me. Anyways, I live with my Uncle Steve. He's on a vacation right now," I explained. Cat went back to the argument, thank god.

"What happened to your parents?" he asked. He seemed a bit nervous. Whatever. I took a deep breath, my secret coming out. Not that one, but the one about my parents.

"Well, honestly, my dad gave me Rex on the day before my ninth birthday and then that same night, he left. My mom, well, took her own life two days later. So, you can imagine that birthdays aren't my favorite thing," the car turned silent and Cat hugged me tightly. Jade stopped texting and looked at me in sympathy. Maybe I should have lied.

"It's okay, I don't mind living with my uncle," I lied. Mr. West just nodded slowly and kept on driving. Jade, to strain from even more awkwardness, turned on the radio. We listened to some Ke$ha song and sang along.

"Um, what happened to your eye?" Mr. West asked me, turning down the radio.

"Oh, I um, wasn't looking where I was going and hit a pole," I lied. Andre looked at me.

"Robbie, you are sure clumsy. I don't think there has been a day that you didn't have a black eye," Andre said. Shit, I hope he isn't too suspicious.

"Well, black eyes take a long time to recover," I answer. He nods and talks with Cat.

We arrive at the beach and we all go out to find a spot. It isn't that busy, thank god. Not that I would even know what busy would be. God, I am just depressing myself. I have got to stop thinking of all this. You have never been to the beach because you don't deserve it, I told myself.

They all take off their covers and head towards the ocean. I set Rex down and run down along with them. The water's cold, but a good cold. It's like I can't explain it, I just love it so much. I grabbed Cat by the knees and threatened to drop her in the water. She giggled and started kicking her legs, scared for her life. I laughed, putting her down.

"Thanks for not dropping me," she giggled.

"Never," I responded, and I mean it. She kissed my cheek, and I couldn't help but blush. She's just so… perfect.

We played and splashed some more but then it was time to go. We all headed back into Mr. West's car.

"So, we're all going to go stop at our houses and get out stuff. We're sleeping over at Jade's house. Where's your house?" I gave Mr. West the address. Cat's was closest. It was huge, so much bigger than mine. I had a house that big before, it was before mom and stuff. She came back, carrying a purple giraffe and a Stitch from Lilo and Stitch pillow pet, along with a backpack. Next was mine. It looked like a dump compared to Cat's. I got out and headed towards my house. I grabbed a bag filled with a pair of pajamas and a pillow, along with fresh clothes for tomorrow. I got out but my bag dropped, but the thing is, this shirt kind of shows my back when I lean down. Whatever, they're probably not even looking. I leaned over and grabbed it, then I jumped back in the car. I smiled, excited. Next was Andre's then we headed towards Jade's house. When they reached the driveway, my heart started beating. This used to be my house.


	4. The Memories are Coming Back

**Hello, so how are you? Sorry if last chapter sucked. I wrote it when it was really late and I was super tired. But, Robbie is free from Steve for a few days but what mysteries will be unlocked in that time? Actually, this is not a mystery story. This is fanfiction, a realistic fanfiction. Um, I'm actually not sure but I know that it's a fanfiction. No crimes! Well, accept abuse. You know what? I'm even confusing myself. I'm just going to write this chapter while listening to Of Monsters and Men. Comment what favorite bands you have! I sort of just want reviews. But everybody does. Anyways, enjoy this chapter! I do not own Victorious.**

**Robbie's POV:**

When they reached the driveway, my heart started beating. This used to be my house. Memories started flowing through my head, I wish I had never agreed to this. I just have to suck it up for everybody's good. I just have to let go of all the bad memories. It shouldn't be that hard, right?

We walked in and I started mentally freaking out. I promised myself I would never come back here, but here I am. I mustered up a smile and walked towards the living room. This was where Dad gave me Rex. For some reason, Mom was mad. I think she knew he would be leaving. They always argued, they never payed attention to me. I wish Steve never paid attention to me. Whenever they fought, I wished that I could be payed attention to. I guess I got that wish.

We all sat around, playing truth or dare, and drinking soda. I can't remember the last time I've had soda. I think it's called Pepsi? Well, whatever, it tastes amazing. It was Jade's turn and she went to me.

"What's your biggest secret?" she asked me. She knows my biggest secret. I roll my eyes and decide to lie, I'll say my third biggest secret.

"Um, well, honestly, I tried to kill myself last year. But hey, I'm fine now," I say. Cat smiled sympathetically and hugged me, which I enjoyed. It was my turn.

"Cat, truth or dare?" I asked her. She scrunched up her nose in thought, which made me want to kiss her so much.

"Um, dare!" she exclaimed excitingly. I thought about this.

"I dare you to kiss the hottest guy here," I said stupidly. I knew it would be Andre, but whatever. I sighed and looked at the ground, not wanting to witness it when Cat kissed my cheek. I blushed like crazy and looked up at her. She then kissed me, like really kissed me. I can't believe a girl as hot as Cat would think I was hot. I've never had a girlfriend, let alone a first kiss. She giggled as she leaned away.

"Well, that hurt," Andre laughed, implying how Cat thinks that I'm hotter than he is. I was speechless.

"Andre, truth or dare?" Cat asked him. He said dare, which was to call his crazy grandmother and to tell her that he was joining the military. It was hilarious. The night went on just like that. But inside, I knew that I was miserable. I mean, yes, I got my first kiss by the girl who I like, and I finally found some real friends, but this was my old house. This is where I found my Mom in the bathroom, dead. This house is where my sucky life started.

Later that night, Jade put in The Scissoring. Cat snuggled up against me, her head burying into my chest, whenever there was a scary part. Which was every five seconds. God, this movie is terrifying. Now I know why it's called The Scissoring.

The movie finished and it was time for bed. Jade slept upstairs with Cat while Andre and I slept on the couches downstairs in the living room.

I woke up, and I saw that Andre was still asleep. I tried to go back asleep but I couldn't. I was used to waking up at five, it just is how it always was. I got up and explored my old house. I found Mr. West awake and in the kitchen, drinking coffee.

"Goodmorning," he said to me, surprised that I was awake this early.

"Hi," I said, sitting on the stool. This house was so much different than it used to be. I wonder why they bought this house, a suicide took place here.

"So, how was your night?" he asked me.

"It was fine. I used to live here," I spit out.

"Oh," he said.

"Why did you buy this house? I mean, they must've told you about the, well, bathroom," I indicated the suicide. I don't know why, I just couldn't say that out loud. Mr. West nodded.

"Ya, I didn't tell anyone else. It was a nice price. Why did you move?" he asked me.

"I had to live with my uncle. No one else would take me in," I explained. I hated explaining this.

"Oh, right. So you said that your father left? What was that like for you?" he asked. Why would he want to know this? I squinted at him and shook my head.

"I don't really feel comfortable talking about it, if that's okay," he opened his mouth, then closed it. He nodded and mumbled an apology, leaving the kitchen. I sighed, he was just curious. Maybe I shouldn't have been that hard on him. Whatever.

I got up and decided to change my shirt. I unbuttoned my pajama shirt and right as I was going to put on my new one, I heard a gasp. I turned around and saw Cat standing in the hallway.

"Robbie?" she asked, eyes huge. Damn.

**Sorry this chapter is so short! Have a nice day, and comment if you want! :)**


	5. Are the Strings Really Attached?

**Hi! How are you guys doing? So, last chapter Cat kissed Robbie (although a dare, she could have kissed Andre but she chose Robbie) but will this sudden move be ruined by how Cat will react to Robbie's back? Read to find out! Do you guys even read this little intro? Some people don't, I do though. Tell me and I will send you virtual bunnies!**

**Robbie's Pov:**

I turned around and saw Cat staring at my back. I quickly put my new shirt on, trying to cover up. Cat ran up to me and touched my back, it stinging in pain. I tried to hide the agony but Cat frowned, taking her hand off my back.

"Robbie, what was all that?" she asks me. I decided to lie.

"I… um, I was hiking when I fell-"

"Don't lie, I know you're not that clumsy," I hung my head in embarrassment.

"My uncle gets angry sometimes," I said, being vague.

"Your uncle did this to you?" she asked, in shock. I nodded and she looked like she was going to cry.

"Ya, but it's okay, really. I swear, it only hurts when people touch it," I try to reassure her. She shakes her head.

"Robbie, this isn't okay. You have to tell someone," I shake my head quickly.

"No, I can't! No one else will be willing to take care of me!" I explain.

"Well, have you ever tried contacting your dad? You said he left," she tried. I know she's trying to help but she just doesn't get it.

"No, he left me Cat. If he wanted anything to do with me, he would have reached out by now. He hates me Cat. And honestly, I don't blame him. I mean, my mom didn't want anything to do with me so she killed herself, my grandparents didn't want anything to do with me, and my uncle hates my guts because he was legally obligated to take me in. It wasn't his choice, that's why he does this to me," I say, pointing to my back.

"But Robbie, if you just-"

"Cat, just stop. I don't want to hear it. He doesn't want anything to do with me, why would I ruin his life? You don't get it, your life is perfect so-"

"My life is not perfect. Do you have any idea what it's like to hear people call you stupid? You don't have a crazy brother who gets out of hand sometimes. You don't understand what it's like to have parents who block you out and only concentrate on your older brother. Everyone thinks of me as the stupid, annoying girl who should be in preschool because I'm not smart enough for high school," Cat finishes. I feel stupid.

"Cat, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I guess no one's life is perfect. I just hate being here," I could feel the tears come in my eyes, it's hard seeing your mother die right in front of your eyes.

"Jade's house?" she asked me, confused.

"I used to live here, before my mom killed herself," I said. I pushed away the bad thought as I sighed. She bit her lip and hugged me. "Cat?" I asked her.

"Yes Robbie?" she asked me, still hugging me.

"Why'd you pick me last night during truth or dare? I thought you would pick Andre," I asked her. I could feel her smile.

"Because I believe that you are hotter than him. And most guys, for that matter," she giggled. What did she just say? What?

"But Cat, have you seen me? I'm not attractive, that was my first kiss, I always have a black eye, I'm awkward and weird, I'm best friends with what most people would call a puppet-" she stopped me by kissing me.

"Robbie, you are attractive, and although the black eye thing is bad, it makes you look sexy," Cat smiled. Um… okay? I'm still trying to wrap my brain around this, she thinks I'm sexy? But, I don't even try anything, okay, ya, I'm tripping out. Ya, I'm tripping out. This is all a delusion.

"Robbie, this is not a delusion, I actually do like you. It's sad that you won't believe how hot you are," I blink back, realizing that I said that last part out loud. I sigh, staring down at the ground.

"It's hard to believe when everyone around you tells you that you're worthless and a nothing. Cat, you might not get this, because you are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my life, but a guy who has nothing in his life, always gets bullied, and abused, is hard to believe in himself. The only thing I truly believe is that I am nothing. I hate my life Cat, I really do. But you're the good part, you really are. I just, I know that you're going to find someone better and perfect, and you guys are going to abandon me. You're going to act like I'm nothing, and that's because you really will realize that I am nothing. I have to stop this before I get my heart broken," I hold back tears, not wanting to cry in front of Cat. Cat blinks back tears, and she sniffles. Cat puts her hand on my arm.

"We aren't going to abandon you, Robbie. We all really like you. I really like you," Cat puts her hand on my cheek and wipes away a tear that fell from my eye.

"You do? You aren't screwing me? You guys didn't become my friend because of a bet?" I ask, hoping that the answer is no, but I think it's yes.

"No, Robbie. Who on earth would do that?" she asks me, squinting her eyes up at me. I shrug.

"I don't know, it just doesn't seem realistic for attractive people to want to be my friend," I shrug, feeling like a girl, being all insecure.

"Robbie, I really like you, we all really like you. You're awesome, Robbie," Cat smiles, and lightly hugs me. "How many people know about this?" she asks me.

"Jade. She figured out the second day of school. Um, don't tell anyone? Please? If you tell someone, they could call the police and I could be sent to a foster home and then I won't be able to go to Hollywood Arts anymore, my uncle gave me the money to go here. He mostly wanted to see me fail, but, I hope that won't happen," I admit. Cat hesitantly nods.

"Okay… it just seems wrong leaving you like this, in your uncle's hands. What happened to your shoulders by the way?" Cat asks me.

"I cut them sometimes," Cat sighs and shakes her head.

"Robbie! I don't get you, you're in pain but yet, you cut yourself for even more pain!" Cat kicks the wall and rolls her eyes in annoyance.

"It's the only part of me that I have control over, Cat," I am surprised by her reaction.

"Robbie, you're killing yourself even more than you are already dying," I raise my eyebrow.

"What? That doesn't make any sense, Cat," I am annoyed at her. Why does she have to argue with me?

"You say you want to have control over your body, by cutting yourself, do you receive the feeling that you are controlling your own body? Or are you in even more pain by doing so? Robbie, cutting is dangerous, you could kill yourself,"

"Maybe that's what I want to do, Cat," I yell at her. Cat opens her mouth then closes it, and then looks at the ground.

"You're going to leave us? Is that it? You hate us so much-"

"I am not doing this because of you, I want to kill myself because my life sucks! Everyone hates me, Cat. You say that you guys don't, but others do, a big majority,"

"Then don't think about that big majority, think about us! Your friends, remember us, Robbie? You are wasting away your life because you are being a dramatic little priss!" Cat yells. I scoff at her. How dare she?

"I can't believe you would even say that, Cat! You have no idea what it's like to be abused every single day, get bullied, and have to put your best friend in your locker because you would get bullied even more if he was out. I do, and it sucks, Cat. You told me that your parents don't pay attention to you because of your brother? Try getting bad attention, try that. At least you aren't getting abused every single day, I am! So don't you dare tell me that I'm being dramatic!" I yell at her. Cat bites her lip and hangs her head.

"I'm sorry, I don't know how it feels. But I do know that by you cutting, your uncle is winning, all those bullies are winning. You're their puppet, Robbie. You obey them and pick up your arms and you cut, you are slowly killing yourself, Robbie. They are pulling your strings, and you're letting them. But what you don't know is that you have the power to cut the strings and finally, finally, be free. You can run, before it's too late," Cat walks closer to me and kisses my cheek. "Cut the strings, Robbie," she whispers in my ear. Cat then leaves, going upstairs. I am perplexed of the previous situation. I sit down on the ground and put my head in my hands. She's right. I am just the puppet.


	6. The Library

**Robbie's POV:**

I squirm in my bed, trying to fall asleep, but all I can hear is Cat's words. "Cut the strings" but I don't know if I can. I don't know what will happen to me if I do. I might get killed in the process, I might fall and shatter on the ground before I can land safely. God, all these stupid metaphors. I close my eyes and instantly seeing myself as a puppet, crashing down on the ground. I sit up and look at my almost broken clock. It reads 10:00. I get up, sighing, knowing that I probably won't get any sleep, and go downstairs. I skim through the television, trying to find something that isn't r rated. I give up, and get dressed, and go outside. I see the empty driveway, and am glad. No Steve to bully me around. I walk around a bit and head to the library. It's never really closed, and I like to go there a lot.

I walk in the doors, and see the aisles and aisles of books. I pick up one that I haven't read in a while. I skim through the pages until I hear someone yell, ouch. I through the book to the ground and look down every aisle, until I see very familiar red hair. I go over to the girl and help her up. Cat looks at me in shock.

"Robbie, what are you doing here?" she asks me.

"I was just going to ask you the same thing," I remarked.

"Well, I like to come here to get away sometimes, that's all. And you?" she asks me.

"Same thing. I couldn't sleep, thanks to you," I poke her in the stomach, making her giggle a little.

"How is that because of me?" she asks, slightly defensive.

"Because of what you said. That people are just controlling me, that I'm just a puppet," I looked at the ground.

"At least I'm getting through to you," Cat said softly.

"Hey Cat?" I asked her.

"Hm?" Cat responded, picking up books and putting them back on shelves.

"Why do you pretend to be all innocent and dumb around everyone?" I ask her. Cat sighs and stops fixing books.

"When I act, it's like I get swept up into this whole different life. And one day in middle school, when my brother was getting worse, I was assigned this fun loving, colorful girl, who yes, was dumb. I loved how her personality made me forget about every stupid, dumb aspect of my life, so I decided that I would become her," Cat explained.

"But aren't you hiding behind a mask?" I ask her. Cat twirled around so fast, it made me get shivers down my spine.

"Aren't you?" she asked in a deep, shrill voice. Cat picked up the last book and placed it gently on the shelf before walking away from me.

"Wait!" I called out to her. She turned around to look at me.

"I'll take off my mask if you do too," Cat shook her head slightly.

"It's not that easy. You of all people would understand that," Cat left the library, leaving me alone. As always.

**Hi! Sorry it was so short, I just thought this was a really good ending. I will update soon, though. Thanks!**


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